We faltered too far down No one could save us

Plaid Shirt, Aritzia
Vest: gift
Necklace: Guess
Liquid leggings: Urban Outfitters
Shoes: Adidas

This outfit is basically my version of a sweatpants day. My boyfriend doesn't believe me, but leggings make me feel like I'm not wearing anything! They're like a second skin. I feel very 90s me in this outfit with its loose fit, layers, and sneakers. I was very different when I was a teenager, which people who have only known me from age 19+ don't know. I definitely wasn't as into fashion, at least not outwardly. I was also in the non-popular crowd because I was quiet and smart. Being quiet allowed me to not be noticed and therefore not picked on, but it also made people think I was really uptight and boring. It's pretty funny considering I would probably cut class for at least a month sometimes.

The song this week is Finger Eleven's First Time. 90s me had a deep love for angry music that still lives with me now. I love a good emotionally wrought song, and if they can scream/sing it, then all the better. In high school one day, one of the cutest, most popular guys in class did a presentation and then he mentioned this song, but nobody except me had even heard of it, or the band. For a moment, I had a dream where I raised my hand and said "I love this song too!" and then we'd gaze into each other's eyes, fall in love, and I'd be prom queen. Of course that never happened, but I still love this song. The video below is kinda uninspired and foreshadows how lame Finger Eleven became when they sold out and became "rock-pop." Feel free to navigate to another tab/window while listening!

First Time lyrics

I had never thought
We were hanging on
But the fall looks very far
Staring at the ground
What flesh will do to you
Will do to me too
Be free and on your own
It's not that simple
It's never that simple

[Chorus:]
It feels like the first time
That we'd fallen behind
And we faltered too far down
No one could save us
It feels like the first time
And we're standing above them
And no one can touch us
The worst is over

I could say to you
A bitter word or two
There's no stopping now
Just get it out in the air
Heard it through the fog
And hurt by it all
I'd take it back today
But it's out of my hands

[Chorus]

Lost in the film again
All the signs were showing
Watching a single frame
When the wind begins
You're never anywhere
'Cause you're caught in my
weather every time

Feels like the first time
We'd fallen behind
No use is the other one to wait
But I can hold on
As sure as I'm strong
Get over the faithful yesterdays

[Chorus till fade]